Cutting the grass is my new favorite chore.
Typically, cutting the grass falls on Shane’s list, but since he broke his leg at the end of May, it has been added to mine.
I have really enjoyed mowing the lawn over the last couple weeks. It wasn’t until yesterday that I fully understood why.
I always like being outside. Even the day I cut the grass in a light rain and was soaked by the time I came in, I still had a smile on my face.
Mowing the lawn has also given me a sense of pride over our outdoor space. I have been spending a lot more time in our yard as a result. Maybe it’s the grass, or maybe it’s the hot weather. The kiddie pool and sprinkler could be the other reason I’ve been out there so often.
The exercise is great, considering I haven’t been able to go to yoga for about a month now.
The above reasons are all well and good. However, my light-bulb moment occurred while mowing yesterday. I was in my own world, just following my neat rows back and forth when Tristan came running by and “shooting” me with his “freeze-ray” (in actuality, a nozzle for the hose). He was saying something to me, but I couldn’t make out a word.
That’s what I get from cutting the grass. The lawn mower is loud enough to drown out everything else. When I’m out there, I can finally hear my own thoughts.
I don’t have to listen to whatever Tristan is playing. I can’t hear a teething Rosie fussing. I don’t have to worry about anybody’s thoughts or needs but my own. That, and making neat rows with the lawn mower. Or not so neat, if I don’t feel like it.
I’m an introvert. I need time and space away from people to recharge. Since Shane’s injury, I’ve been on duty 24/7 between him and the kids. I’m flat-out exhausted. I’ve hardly had any time to myself and mostly feel like an empty shell.
It’s hard to keep giving and giving when you feel like you’re already running on empty with no opportunity to fill yourself up.
So this lawn mowing thing, it is life changing for me. Finally, a way to grab a little slice of peace and
quiet a manicured lawn.
Eventually, when Shane is back on his feet, he can clean the bathrooms. Cleaning toilets doesn’t bring me peace.
I’ll be outside, cutting the grass.